I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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