Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Damn victory sex feels great
Randomize
