singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
