you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
