I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
they call him Oral-B. enough said
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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