HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
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