yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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