oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
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