they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
