My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
He shit in the fireplace
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize