Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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