at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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