Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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