they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
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