Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
