Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
