i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
