eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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