Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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