He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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