Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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