she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
