yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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