i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
