i just wanna soil my oats bro
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize