I'm lost and stupid without you.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Randomize
