ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
