my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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