My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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