those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
