She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
