White coat. Heels.
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize