hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
