I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
