at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
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