I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
