So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
