Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
