i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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