But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize
