i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
