I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
