i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
