we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Drunk is a universal language darling
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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