i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
