No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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