I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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