butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize