Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
