theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
No I am not eating basil off your cock
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Randomize
